Nami Clarke is the pint-sized powerhouse that fuels Little Tsunami. Nami is a writer, business woman, visual creator and conversation starter. We have asked Nami to share on the topic progress…
Progress noun/ proh-gres/ 1 forward movement towards a destination. 2 development towards an improved or more advanced condition. – Oxford English Dictionary
I think I’ve always measured my life with progress – I plan ahead, I look for the next project, how I can take things to the next level, class or new things we might do next as a family. I know that I am happy if I have a goal or a dream on the horizon. Apparently it’s all about the journey and while I do try to remind myself of this the destination for me is just as important.
I am destination driven, and without a clear goal in sight I feel like I’m treading water. I’m not patient, nor am I good at sitting still. I could beat myself up about not stopping to smell the roses often enough or I could just use these things to my advantage (and keep a close eye on burnout!).
Becoming a mother was always something I wanted to realise. My hub and I were on the same page from the moment we met and I think we started to plan our family before we began planning our wedding. Motherhood however, the most grandiose plan of all, stopped me in my tracks. I felt like I went from a multitasking queen to wondering whether I should bother getting dressed or even showering come 3pm most days. Throw in running a business, a PND diagnosis and an over-zealous drive to get everything ‘right’, motherhood challenged everything I thought I knew about progress – the very thing I’d aligned it with.
Progress is a difficult concept to measure, especially when it’s intertwined with motherhood. We’ve supposedly ‘progressed’ so much and as young women we were raised to believe, or indeed expect that we can have it all. Yes, we’ve made progress (and I’m not interested in turning this into a feminist rant) but I do wonder if all this busy-ness and stress is actually mistaken for moving onward and upward and ahead in life as mothers? There is often a pull in me that seeks to wind the clock back in some ways, to a simplified way of parenting, where I didn’t need to live nearly 3 hours away from my mother so I could have a great career, provide my child with what I believe can be a great education and a wonderfully privileged life. It does make me sit back and question how far is it worth progressing as life becomes equally frantic and demanding.
The ‘have it all’ mother is a very busy mother indeed. Is that progress? (And no, I don’t have the answer to this question but I would love to hear your thoughts!)
Although I didn’t realise it at the time, my blog, Little Tsunami, was born out of my journey and challenge throughout motherhood. I reconnected with my lost love of writing from a desire to create and this has always enabled me to process how I’m feeling. Little Tsunami delivers something purely for me to enjoy and challenge myself with, and most often in blissful solitude! I can start with a blank canvas but within a relatively short amount of time have something to show for my efforts. I love that the interviews, the stories, and the recording of these heartfelt experiences begin with a gentle hello between me and my Little Tsunami mums – what unfolds next is not entirely up to me, I am just the ferryman, and that is a very exciting, humbling and often daunting task all at the same time.
I think that Little Tsunami is drawing in both readers and participants alike because it provides a very supportive platform for women to share their story of motherhood – in all its wonderful and diverse forms. When we sit down, look back on past experiences and record our stories they become markers of our progress. There’s often that little “a-ha!” moment when we recognise that right here, right now is nowhere near as hard life may have felt on day one, week one, or even in the first year of being a mother.
For other mothers I’ve interviewed I think Little Tsunami has provided anopportunity to put down some baggage and free up the load a little, with the goal to move forward to a new, better place in life and put some of the difficulties of the past behind them. After being inundated with incredibly positive support following the publication of her story, one of my Little Tsunami mums commented: “I am hopeful that by [sharing my story] I can help another person on their own journey. This is my goal and the first step for me in achieving this” .
Little Tsunami could be described as my own balance against the noise of ‘progress’ and the constant demands of my to-do list as a mum. Perhaps subconsciously I have a drive and desire to create an ‘online village’, in attempt to balance the relatively limited familial village in which I reside as amother. Sure, we can’t drop off a virtual casserole or bring our Dropbox our kids over for a play but there’s a lot to be said about being heard and feeling supported by others who share similar circumstances or experiences. That core need for human connectedness will never change, for all the progress in the world.
Ps. You can check out my Little Tsunami guest post here.