I never have been a fan of baby showers. An event based on gifts is never my favourite thing but then throw in some horrendous games like ‘guessing the chocolate by smelling the nappy’ and you have got me wishing for the cake to hurry up so I can leave.
This isn’t to say that I don’t love celebrating new life coming into the world, and all the excitement that comes with it. I just wished there was a different way to do it.
And there is. A Blessingway, and they rock. I had never been to a Blessingway but I somehow stumbled across the concept. Think it must of happened when following all the cool ‘modern hippie’ mums I follow on Instagram.
A Blessingway is derived from Native American ceremonies celebrating and honouring the mother bringing in a new life into the world. The focus of a Blessingway isn’t gifts, but rather the sisterhood coming together to show their support, blessings and practical love for the upcoming birth and newborn life.
I loved the idea of a Blessingway. It really sounded like something that fitted my values and also would help me through as this is my first birth without my mum. She loved babies and loved us kids. Even though she was in Pallative care when I had Ari she still managed to show so much interest and support. I’m really missing that support so much. Thank God for my beautiful soul sisters who support me constantly.
A Blessingway seemed like a great way to celebrate our sisterhood and thank them for all their help.
So off I went and decided to organise one. Reliable Pinterest and Google gave me a bunch of ideas. I then roped in the support of my amazing student doula Becky (doulas are da bomb but I will keep that for another post), and Jimena from Pali Healing Hearts. I also asked my We Ain’t Boring Co-Founder Soud if we could have it at her place (I love Soud’s place it’s so feminine and comfy, the perfect place to gather the sisterhood).
With everything kind of in place – Thai food for dinner, yummy desserts, candles burning – the space was saged and this is what happened …
On my surfing the web adventure, I discovered this cool idea of prayer flags. I went to my happy place aka Kmart and picked up some party bunting that could be written on. I then asked each soul sister to write me a kind word, encouragement or a wish. I am planning to hang these “prayer flags” in my hospital room and then back at home to encourage me through those inevitable hard times and two hourly feeds.
My gorgeous doula Becky offered to give me a henna belly. I was all for it but with my constant painful Braxton hicks I figured I wouldn’t be able to keep that still for that long. So instead Becky did a beautiful design on my hand and offered up other pretty designs for the other lovelies.
Oracle Card readings
Jimena offered one card/short readings to everyone in attendance. This was done casually as everyone else mingled. I believe most of the lovelies got a reading and enjoyed it!
Jimena then surprised us all with a few special Blessingway ceremonies…
Jimena had asked all the girls to bring a flower. Each lovely then took a turn placing a flower in my hair, whilst saying what they hoped for Bub and I. It took all my strength not to cry when this was happening. Talk about feeling loved!
Jimena bought in a candle and passed it around the circle, asking each Lovely to pause, hold the candle and send a blessing for Bubba and I. I was then given the candle and told to light it whenever I’m feeling the need for support, when labour starts and when Bub first comes home.
Jimena got all the Lovelies in a circle and around the circle and passed around a ball of thread. Everyone wrapped it around either a part of themselves or on a item they use all the time like on a keychain. Once we were all connected, a blessing was read and each person cut off their piece of thread. The idea is that each Lovely keeps her thread tied until they hear the birth announcement. Everyone will then cut their own thread releasing all the blessings. It is pretty sweet knowing everyone is as excited as me for this birth and wearing a daily reminder about it. Also makes me want Bubba to come NOW so people can stop wearing their thread!
This massive love-in totally set me on the right path. It was a big step for me to ask for something like this, and to accept the support and love. It reduced a lot of my anxiety as I was really scared on how Hubby and I were not going to drown with three kids under five. The Blessingway confirmed that the Sisterhood will always support us and I have nothing to be afraid of. I only need to open up to ask for the help and be willing to accept it (something I’m working on). I really believe Blessingways are the shiz and many of my soul sisters agree telling me afterwards how much they enjoyed it.
Consider throwing one next time a baby is on the way. You won’t be disappointed.
Ps. If you live in Canberra or Sydney, Jimena is now offering Blessingways as part of her services.